She would say something, then he would say “huh?" 

That is, if he responded at all.

After repeating herself about three times, grandma would finally say in an exasperated tone, “Turn up your hearing aid!"

To which he would insert his little finger into his ear, and turn that little dial.

Looking back, I'm not really sure that he ever actually turned it up…because this routine just seemed to repeat itself so often.

As a result he missed all those things that Grandma was saying to him, prodding him to do or grousing about.

Sometimes deafness can be a blessing.

For instance, what if you missed all those things “they say" about your opponent..

especially this week.

“I hear he's really good."

Or maybe not.

Your bracket is really tough!

Your weight class is the toughest class in the entire state!

There are 7 state placers in your bracket! (Correction:  in any state bracket, there are EIGHT placers.  Last year doesn’t count.)

Criminy, folks, sometimes “they" are overzealous dads with a little ‘nip’ in their coffee, pumping up their own kid!

Or junior high kids with a ‘lied-about-their-age profile (see Facebook), inflating their buddy!

“Look out for Johnny, he’s going to ‘make some noise’ this year…" (Johnny’s current record:  3-19).

So take my advice this week….

Turn down the hearing aid.

Turn down the hearing aid.

get off the Facebook, get off the bulletin boards, and get off the made-up-in-someone’s head rankings.

Go strap’er on, and hit the mat.  The score always starts 0-0.

I tell him,”We can fix that in five minutes…. sure I can help.”

And I proceeded to teach him leg counters.

In five minutes.

So we get done, he leaves and I don’t think anything more about it…

until the next afternoon when I get a phone call.

Same kid.

Excitedly tells me this:

“I just won my wrestle off!  He threw legs and I countered it, using what you taught me yesterday!”

Well, a few days ago history repeated itself.

Athlete in my room, facing a leg rider.

We spent time on the counter.  

You can probably guess the rest.

Shuts down the opponents legs, wins the match…and his league.

That’s the nice, happy story with a happy ending.  

 However, there’s another story that happens way too often.  

Tell me if you’ve seen this one too.

Athlete comes, learns winning technique, uses it to win a match.

Then he figures, Hey –  I’ve got it down, I don’t need to go back there again.  

A year later, same wrestler loses…

from exact position that he won from before.  

It always amazes me when people shun a successful path.

and that’s exactly what winning wrestling involves…a successful path.

Tell me what skills in life you can develop in a single hour or two hour-long session…without out ever practicing, visualizing or even reading about it again.

I’ll bet Its a pretty short list.

Imagine spending one session learning how to ride a bike…and then never going back and practicing.

How far do you think you’d get on that bike?

Not very.

But people do this all the time and it really puzzles me. 

There’s a process to winning at anything.  In wrestling, I call it the phase five process.

It is, quite simply, the true key to success in learning and implementing new skills from start to finish.

Starting point:  learning a new skill for the first time.

Finish line:  being able to execute it in live match settings. 

Sadly, the steps to getting there are often ignored.  People lack the knowledge and skill to truly get from Phase One to Phase Five…leading to great amounts of frustration for wrestlers, athletes and coaches alike.

Beasey Hendrix was a legend in sports psychology, especially wrestling psychology.  He personally crafted an intricately detailed system of mental preparation for matches.  His book, Wrestle your perfect match, became the blueprint for many wrestlers.

In this short video, he bluntly and humorously explained his answer to wrestlers who didn't feel like training hard.

Cher is an award winning singer, actress, performer and businesswoman.  However, what I am about to tell you about her will amaze and shock you.

I was up late one night recently, reading Cher’s bio, and I learned some fascinating facts about her life.

I have always had a keen interest in learning about highly successful people and in particular, their journey to the top…but this was something else.

Setting aside for a minute Cher's personal setbacks, (two failed marriages) Cher has had many professional failures along the way, such as…

• two failed television series
• several failed attempts at a solo career
• failed Sonny and Cher television show,
• several failed Sonny and Cher albums  resulting in getting dropped from her label several times
• 2 failed attempts with Geffen records
• two early movie failures which practically sunk her acting career.

I'm sure I've missed a few as well.

Finally, even after gaining much success, on the screen as well as in music, Cher wound up nearly bankrupt, a single mom with a spotty acting resume that few took seriously…to the point where, when people saw her name in the credits, they started to laugh.

At the same time, she suffered a slowdown of her musical career.

Finally she caught a break (please don’t call it luck), snagged a Broadway role that led to a movie role, followed by Golden Globe and Oscar winning roles, and she was back.

Cher changed musical directions several times…

“Take me home” became a worldwide success. With success in music, film and television, as well as launching successful fitness videos and doing lucrative infomercials, she eventually built a $600 billion dollar empire.

Amazing success story with plenty of roadblocks along the way.

Whatever you think of Cher, like her, love her, hate her, indifferent – you gotta respect her perseverance, that never-quit attitude that kept her going.

I’m always fascinated by stories of highly successful people…

and every time I am able to dig deep, I find a familiar pattern…

a person who has been knocked down, and gotten back up, numerous times.

I find great life lessons in such things, that can relate directly to wrestling.

I’m reminded often that you have to be willing to fail if you’re ever going to succeed.

Now I'm talking to you parents.

Does your athlete (if you’re a parent) have every opportunity to fail? If not, they are being robbed of incredible opportunities for success.

Every time Cher failed, she learned from the experience… but she never stopped trying.

I was just in the room with a parent that “gets it”, understands the importance of letting their young athlete fail so he can grow from it.

Many parents don’t understand what that looks like.

I want the athletes in my room to embrace the challenge, not fear it. A parents approach is paramount to his ability to accomplish that and here’s why:

No matter who you are, how mentally or physically tough you are, nobody…and I do mean nobody – is on, at their best, wrestles their best, every time out. Its just not how it works for us mere mortals.

Just ask Cher.

As a parent, it is easy to deal with your athlete’s successes…those times when he is on, competing at his best, at the top of his game.

What’s hard is dealing with the flip-side of that coin. Bad match, not at the top of his game, lacks intensity, motivation, energy, focus, direction.

Now what do you do?

First of all, your athlete needs a ‘soft place to land.’ In other words, you want your athlete to always feel he can come over to you when things don’t go well. Now, he may need some time to himself after a loss, but you want him to feel okay with coming over afterwards.

How to Guarantee your athlete will want to come to you

Remember, the good times are easy to manage. The challenge is when things go awry.

Here’s a guaranteed method that my own mother used with me…and I never hesitated to come over when a match was over, no matter how poorly I wrestled.

Never in my life, did either of my parents ever tell me how I did, what I did wrong, or criticize my effort in any way, shape or form.

Instead, I got open ended questions or silence.

Open ended questions such as, “well, what do you think?” Or “what can be learned from this experience?” Even, “what’s your plan?”

Sometimes though, silence was best. My parents would let me do the talking – if I felt like it.

Because of my parents’ approach (especially my mom’s, since my dad wasn’t always there), I never dreaded going over to them after a match. I had my ‘soft place to land’ when necessary.

As a result, I had a lot of success in the sport… and to this day, retain the passion for the sport I fell in love with.

After failure – and, like Cher, I’ve had plenty – I kept getting back up and trying harder.

I still fail sometimes – but I don’t fear it.

That’s the true model for success, not only in wrestling, but in life.

We simply can’t be afraid to fail…and parents can help tremendously in developing that mindset.

Today, many elite athletes do the opposite of what was intended…

They decide what weight class to compete in, weigh in at the testing site no higher than that weight (an athlete wanting to compete at 113 would weigh in no higher than 113 lbs.)…often employing unhealthy, unsafe methods to get there. They make scratch weight one time, wrestle up for most of the year, and crash down for tournament time.

How the rules in this state do the opposite of keeping athletes safe and competing at their natural weight

Encourage athletes to cut weight drastically and make weight too early

Many elite, and near-elite athletes will do the above…cut the weight in advance – so they can get to their weight class

Allow athletes to compete only once at their weight during the season

Because there is no 50% rule anymore (requiring athletes to weigh in at their chosen weight class at least half the time), athletes can make it once – usually early – then not ever have to make scratch weight again. When the state grants the growth allowance, and athletes return to that weight class, they get the extra pounds. This allows wrestlers to wrestle up most of the year and come crashing down at the end of the year when the most important events are held…sectionals, districts, and state.

Change the rules at the end of the year, encouraging massive weight cutting

During the year, athletes have to weigh in, and then wrestle 1 or 2 hours later…a rule that, in itself, discourages large weight cutting because the recovery time is short. Then, when it counts the most – at sectionals, districts and state…
they change the rules.

Allow night before weigh-ins…thereby encouraging athletes to drop as much weight as they can…and in effect, punishing those who manage their weight and wrestle close to their weight class.

Don't believe me?

I just read an article about MMA fighters. It centered on how they drop 20-30 lbs to make a weight class, then, because they have 24 hours to recover, systematically regain 15-25 lbs in that 24 hour period so they have a size advantage over their opponent.

Scary and definitely harmful to the body.

If you don't think high school wrestlers (and even younger athletes) do something similar, then you haven't been up close to see it but its out there.

Last year I went to Fargo. One athlete stands out to me…

He spent hours…and I mean probably 5 hours…working out to get back down to weight. Years ago, one of my trainees, wrestling at 103 (before the weight classes changed) ended up in the placement round at state…against a kid who weighed over 130 lbs.

We lost. Our opponent defaulted out to 6th place…but got to be a state placer by skirting the rules.

Makes you wonder if we have learned nothing from 1997.

to sum it up…

Many of our high school wrestlers in this state cut drastic amounts of weight earlier than ever before, to make scratch when they certify. During certification they go through a regimen of dehydration, followed by precisely timed hydration that allows them to pass the hydration test…then they go up during the season and come crashing down at the end of the year since they weigh in the night before for the important tournaments.

At state tournament time, they are encouraged, due to the current rules, to suck down hard and then gain as much weight as possible for the next day's matches. They can do so because of the amount of recovery time built into the system.

Does this sound healthy to you?

What reality looks like

Today, many elite athletes do the opposite of what was intended…

They decide what weight class to compete in, weigh in at the testing site no higher than that weight (an athlete wanting to compete at 113 would weigh in no higher than 113 lbs.)…often employing unhealthy, unsafe methods to get there. They make scratch weight one time, wrestle up for most of the year, and crash down for tournament time.

How the rules in this state do the opposite of keeping athletes safe and competing at their natural weight

Encourage athletes to cut weight drastically and make weight too early

Many elite, and near-elite athletes will do the above…cut the weight in advance – so they can get to their weight class

Allow athletes to compete only once at their weight during the season

Because there is no 50% rule anymore (requiring athletes to weigh in at their chosen weight class at least half the time), athletes can make it once – usually early – then not ever have to make scratch weight again. When the state grants the growth allowance, and athletes return to that weight class, they get the extra pounds. This allows wrestlers to wrestle up most of the year and come crashing down at the end of the year when the most important events are held…sectionals, districts, and state.

Change the rules at the end of the year, encouraging massive weight cutting

During the year, athletes have to weigh in, and then wrestle 1 or 2 hours later…a rule that, in itself, discourages large weight cutting because the recovery time is short. Then, when it counts the most – at sectionals, districts and state…
they change the rules.

Allow night before weigh-ins…thereby encouraging athletes to drop as much weight as they can…and in effect, punishing those who manage their weight and wrestle close to their weight class.

Don't believe me?

I just read an article about MMA fighters. It centered on how they drop 20-30 lbs to make a weight class, then, because they have 24 hours to recover, systematically regain 15-25 lbs in that 24 hour period so they have a size advantage over their opponent.

Scary and definitely harmful to the body.

If you don't think high school wrestlers (and even younger athletes) do something similar, then you haven't been up close to see it but its out there.

Last year I went to Fargo. One athlete stands out to me…

He spent hours…and I mean probably 5 hours…working out to get back down to weight. Years ago, one of my trainees, wrestling at 103 (before the weight classes changed) ended up in the placement round at state…against a kid who weighed over 130 lbs.

We lost. Our opponent defaulted out to 6th place…but got to be a state placer by skirting the rules.

Makes you wonder if we have learned nothing from 1997.

to sum it up…

Many of our high school wrestlers in this state cut drastic amounts of weight earlier than ever before, to make scratch when they certify. During certification they go through a regimen of dehydration, followed by precisely timed hydration that allows them to pass the hydration test…then they go up during the season and come crashing down at the end of the year since they weigh in the night before for the important tournaments.

At state tournament time, they are encouraged, due to the current rules, to suck down hard and then gain as much weight as possible for the next day's matches. They can do so because of the amount of recovery time built into the system.

Does this sound healthy to you?

What they should do instead

If the state, and the federation, made a couple changes, they could immediately make Ohio wrestling healthier…which should be a high priority to them.

First, require the same rules at the end of the year as the beginning. Weigh-ins for sectional, district and state should be between one and two hours, but no more than 2 hours, prior to competition. In addition, weigh-ins should take place every day of competition.

Don't tell me it can't be done, I know better. While the current system might be easier to administrate, it needs to change for the sake of the athletes, and it is doable.

Secondly, employ the 50/50 rule…or some variation of it. Regardless, athletes should be competing, or at least weighing in, at their weight class, more than twice in order to compete there at the end of the year.

Third – and I know this won't happen – either do away with alpha testing or fix it. This is a federation issue that trickles down to the state.

I don't have a solution for fixing it, but having athletes crash down to scratch weight early in the season is not healthy and needs to change. Governing bodies of wrestling will not do away with it, because it is their CYA assurance that they are keeping athletes safe…which they are not…but it keeps them legal.

But this system is flawed.

If you employed the first two rules, you wouldn't need the alpha testing at all. Athletes who couldn't compete an hour after weigh-ins, would change weight classes.

Nobody likes to lose and feel like crap in doing so.

How you can cope with alpha testing and win

Since neither the state nor the federation are interested in listening to yours truly for advice, we can't count on the above, very positive changes for our sport, happening. Therefore, you need a plan for safely working within the system to your advantage, so here goes…

1. Have a body fat assessment done independently in early fall so you know what weight you can get to in a healthy manner.
2. Be smarter than the state, start reducing in the fall.  Instead of crashing down to your given weight class, take the 1 1/2% rule and apply it, starting in September if need be. 
3. Weigh in for alphas at or below scratch weight (if you are going 106, weigh 106 or below).  Follow some of the smart guidelines out there regarding hydration.  Get under your weight class, and a few hours before the test, drink a couple pounds of water weight so you are hydrated.
4. If you work out in advance of, and the same day as the alpha test, you are likely to register a lower body fat.  Keep that in mind if you are not planning on making scratch weight at alphas.
5. Follow my weight management guide to stay as healthy as possible during the season while working out. 

If you are not currently on the athletes email list, fill out the form below and you will immediately get the weight management guide sent to your inbox.

He ended up training sentry dogs even though his education was in chemical engineering.  Last year he and my brother went out west to meet with the Canine Unit that served 50 years ago.  He met up with some folks he hadn't seen since the war ended.

Lets all take a moment to thank our Veterans.  Without them we wouldn't have our freedom.

Let's take a closer look at each of these.

Alcohol

Drinking alcohol is already illegal for those under the age of 21, and the effects have been well documented. Drinking can lead to poor conditioning, impaired judgement, accidents, greatly decreased athletic ability and a host of other issues. There aren't many people who need convincing that alcohol use is a bad decision for youngsters.

Women

Ask yourself how many times you've skipped a workout because of a significant other. Having a serious girlfriend can have serious consequences for an athlete. His focus shifts to something other than the task at hand. Anytime I see a wrestler holding hands with a girl at a wrestling meet, I know he's not focused on the meet. In life, it is imperative that we prioritize. Young athletes struggle to prioritize, especially when it comes to the opposite sex.

Drugs

While the above two are well-known, the third one is the only one on the ballot in Ohio, where the state is considering legalization.

While much of the emphasis has been on medical marijuana, recreational marijuana would also become legal.

The True Story you must read

For those who argue that pot is a “harmless” drug, allow me to share with you this true story…

Years ago there was a young man who trained with me… came to camps, as well as my club. Had an edge to him but I liked him and enjoyed working with him. He was a likable, gregarious, outgoing young man.

As many athletes come and go, he did as well. I didn't hear much about him until about a year after his graduation…

That's when I saw his obituary in the paper.

A call to his coach told me the rest of the story…

He had started smoking pot early in high school, and continued after graduation. He slowly drifted, losing interest in everything in his life, except getting high.

They found his body next to the train tracks. They weren't sure how long he'd been there – perhaps 3 days. He was 19 years old.

A gateway drug

Marijuana is a 'gateway' drug…it often leads to the use of harder drugs. While I am well aware that many people smoke pot, lead constructive lives, and manage to do fine in life, there's no question that it has a dulling effect on the senses, causing one to care less about goals, plans, and life in general. And I know from personal experience the effect it can have on a young person. Quite frankly, in the position I am in, I have seen many athletes ruined by pot use. Too many to ever convince me it is a harmless recreational endeavor.

Here's my biggest concern with the legalization of pot…It condones use of drugs and it sends the wrong message to our young people. Even if the voters reject the legalization of pot, just having it on the ballot tells our young people that, on some level, we condone its use and don't think it is harmful. That's not the message we should be sending.

If you don't agree with me, that's fine. If you don't believe me, ask the mother, or the father, of a young person who died from the use of drugs, whether their child ever smoked pot. I can be pretty sure what their answer will be.